SPEAKER_01 0:00

And I started having this conversation with my mom. And I realized that my mom didn't have enough money like in her 401k to take her through retirement. And I remember, I think it was for like three days that I just stared at the ceiling. I couldn't sleep because I was like, like, what what are we going to do? Because we have this understanding of who are my parents going to call for help? I am the only one. So I really had this Mulan moment.

SPEAKER_00 0:32

Building wealth takes more than just a nine to five. Is it ideal? No. But the reality is that it takes more work and does require some sacrifice. What are you willing to do to get to the next level? Today we're coming at you with some tough love because in today's economy, we have to get creative and sacrifice to get ahead. Welcome back to Real Estate Chase May, the show where we talk about money, real estate, and everything your family never taught us about wealth. Don't forget to join our Latino real estate investing community in school. It's free to join. Link is down in the show notes and descriptions. Today we're going somewhere a little more personal than usual. We're talking about what it actually costs to build financial freedom when you're a first-gen Latina and your whole family still counting on you for everything.

Violeta 1:25

Yeah, because getting financially free unfortunately does cost some things. It requires some sacrifices, it requires getting creative because, yeah, nowadays just one income is just not enough. Everything's high, cost of living, everything's crazy. The job market is crazy, and we gotta get a little bit creative, but also want to talk about the reality because you see it on social media that oh, we became financial free. Lynn starting her own business, quitting her nine of five, and outside looking in is like, oh, that's awesome, but you don't see what sacrifices we had to make. And so we kind of want to like do a little bit of the background. Of course, you know, it's a little bit of tough love, like she mentioned, but we just kind of want to also be realistic and set realistic expectations of what it actually takes. And so today's guest is going to tell us, you know, exactly what it has cost her, boundaries she has to had have set with you know, family or friends, the kind of mindset shift she's had to shift to, and also talk about how sometimes it can get a little bit lonely in this path. I know with myself, I'm glad that I found an you know Lynn in this community, but it does get a little bit lonely because not everyone has a similar mindset and similar goals. So she's gonna talk a little bit about that. Today's guest is Ingrid Morales. Hola Ingrid, thank you so much for joining us today.

SPEAKER_01 2:58

Yes, thank you for having me. Hey hustlers, I'm really excited to get into some cheese mesito today with Lynn and Violeta. And as they both mentioned, I am a first gen Latina. I've learned how to build financial freedom on my own. It's definitely come with a lot of sacrifices, setting boundaries, especially being from our Latino Hispanic community. I'm really excited to get into it today and teach you what I've learned and also get into some cheese me.

SPEAKER_00 3:27

Oh, welcome, welcome. So we wanted to ask you, like to take us back to the beginning, what did things actually look like for you financially growing up? I mean, it's just a question that we all ask our guests, but was there ever a specific moment, a single day even where you said to yourself, oh, this has to change?

SPEAKER_01 3:48

Yeah, absolutely. So I'm originally from Colombia, South America. I was born there, raised there part of my life, and then I came to the US. And I think we all heard it growing up, right? You go to school, ponte las pilas, do your best, get a good job, and then save, and that's it. And I grew up with that embedded. I was always a really good student, but I saw my parents struggling. I grew up with a single mom. I saw her live paycheck to paycheck, and I realized very quickly working hard is not enough. Like you can show up and do everything right, but just saving isn't going to get you anywhere. But I also realized another truth as well. I started getting into books and the, you know, this was before we had Instagram and TikTok. So I would go to the library and pick up books. And what would I notice? I noticed a lot of people who I'll never forget one of the first books I started reading on financial freedom and literacy was Rich Dad, Poor Dad. And then I got cash flow and in the quadrant of money. And I would read them and I realized that the books, although they're really good, they started on this notion of assuming that you already had money. Like they would say, okay, this is what you're gonna do with $20,000. And in the meantime, I would look into my bank account and I had five bucks. So it was, I started realizing quickly, I can't move in this world the same way that most people do when it comes to building financial freedom because I'm not starting from the same place. And so that's when I started realizing well, a lot of times, and I think this is probably mostly true for our first gen and Latino community, working on financial freedom and real estate, that first deal, your first few deals are gonna come out of your own money. Like the first deal that I worked on, it was the one that took me years to save. But then once you build the credibility and you start learning and you start putting yourself in the right rooms, things turn into a snowball and it starts moving more quickly and you get more creative. But in order to do that, I started first with a career, which I think is what most of us do. We find a W2, we save, and we learn how to invest, and then slowly we start trying to make our investments produce more than our W2. And that's when you can make the switch.

Violeta 6:19

Yeah, I'm glad that you mentioned about it. You were mentioning about like the rich dad, poor dad, and like I get hesitant with that one too, because of exactly what you just said that in that book, like his dad is a teacher, and his mom I forget what her career was, but was also, and then he had access to the rich dad, of course. And like us first gen, like our parents like barely have any education, if any, and we're the first ones, so like I think you hit it right on the head of like it's a good foundation. I get what the what it's trying to say, but again, yeah, like we have to understand that we don't have access to a lot of that stuff, so yeah, we do have to get creative and make the sacrifices and figure out a way how to get it done. And so, yeah, I want to go into a little bit of that. You were already getting into that story, but I just wanted to make sure I I kind of ping on that because I really like that you did mention that because a lot of people won't mention that difference with these types of books, like good fundamentals, but also take it with a grain of salt.

SPEAKER_01 7:24

Yes, absolutely. And I always say I'm a big bookworm, but for anyone listening to this, you're always going to learn more by doing than by reading and consuming back-to-back videos on YouTube. You actually have to go and do it. And I wanted to backtrack, you had asked me what was the moment that things like switched and flipped. When I was in college and I put myself through school, I did a bunch of odd jobs. One of them was cleaning houses, and I used to clean houses, and I remember from word of mouth, I started not being able to keep up with my business. And so I started with a friend and I asked her, Hey, I have so much work today. Do you want to come and like make some money? She was like, Yeah. And then slowly I started like growing this business, and that's like what made the switch flip when I realized, wait a minute, like my superpower isn't coming in and trying to get in more hours of work, more hours of work. It's how do you creatively and smartly grow something? And I think investing in financial freedom is if you learn that skill, you can apply it to whether you want to get into real estate investing stocks, other things. Like you have to change the survival mindset that we grew up with and get out of the mentality of let me just put in my time for work. It's okay to start there. That's okay. A lot of us start there, but you have to evolve as well in order to invest and build financial freedom.

SPEAKER_00 8:54

Yeah, I totally agree with that. And it's so great that that happened to you when you were in college. You were like, oh, wait, I could do this too. Like, it's not just for people that are entrepreneurs, people that have like brick and mortar buildings or anything like that. Like, I can make this happen for myself. And I think for me, it was like way later in life. It's probably already 30. And a nurse came, a traveler nurse that we were having the same job came into the room and said to me, like, Lindsay, you don't have to work that hard, you just have to work smarter. And I was just like, I'm sure I heard that phrase in the past, right? But I didn't hear it until that moment, like really listen to like we were doing the same job, taking care of the same patients, but she was getting paid significantly more. And I was just like, Why can't I be her? Like, what is different between the both of us, right? And then it starts with that thought.

Violeta 9:46

Absolutely. Yeah, I definitely was not receptive to that either in college. I was too focused on my school, but also like partying, and so I worked hard or whatever, and and like I would save or whatever, but I was still in that survival mode because I was having to pay like similar like to you, Ingrid. As I had to pay my college, my dad helped a little bit, but I definitely had to do some of it as well, and so yeah, like looking back, yeah, I was like, Oh, it would have been nice, but I also didn't know any of these things were available. I didn't know about like stocks or anything like that. I was again just focused on like getting out of the survival mode of going to get my degree, making sure I could get a career so then I can become financially stable. And then once that did happen, then I was able to like breathe enough to like actually start looking at YouTube. It was very brand new back then, but well not very brand new, but like people were starting to like talk about this stuff and started picking up books and stuff like that. So yeah, then I was able to like finally start realizing like, oh, actually I should probably Helen said work smarter instead of just you know working hard and trading my mental health and body for a paycheck.

SPEAKER_01 11:09

Yeah, absolutely. And you know, I'll have a lot of people they'll send me DMs or in conversations and they'll always ask me, how do I get started investing, or how do I get started in real estate? And it all goes back to very simple principles. If you're familiar with Maslow's hierarchy of needs, the first things you always have to take care of are stability, you know, having a roof over your head. And that it's really hard to start investing when you can't pay your bills or focus on building a business when like basically your life is on fire, right? And I think that that's where we get stuck, like we stay in that building stability, stability, and then we get so scared of taking risks and we doubt ourselves. But the reality is if you build a good foundation so that you can give yourself the safety net, then you get comfortable or more comfortable rather taking those risks. And that's when the mindset starts changing and you start evolving, and that's when, yeah, I always say that's when the world becomes your oyster. But you have to build that stability first for sure.

Violeta 12:12

Um, the same way I'll get like people, and I and I get it because of like you know, everything's so more accessible now with like YouTube. They'll see a YouTube where like you know, we're investing and they get motivated. And it's like, well, like first take a step back. Are you stable right now? Because you definitely can't go out there and take risks on you know a rental property or any other venture until you got a good strong foundation. So yeah, I'm glad you mentioned that as well because first stability and then go. And that's what I always mention is like if you're not stable at home, like don't start thinking about other things yet. Like first fix that, and then we could work on the next step. And I think a lot of some people have a hard time with that because they want to do everything all at once. I think for me it was that mindset of like the first gen and feeling behind, and so now you're trying to do all the things, trying to get stable, but also invest and everything because you know you have to get all these things, but it's like just one thing at a time for right now.

SPEAKER_01 13:14

Yeah, it it is one thing at a time, and I think for us, slow and steady wins the race. There's many successful real estate investors, mentors that I've had, and anytime I've asked him for advice, 90% of them have always told me grow as slow as you can. Because when you take on too many things at once, that's when things start to fall apart. And I think on the stability side for us that are first gen, Latino, and kind of figuring things out on our own, I think that's really where we get stuck because we confuse two things. It's we confuse building stability for ourselves and then building stability for our entire family, and we take on that responsibility, and that's where we get stuck in this cycle of poverty. Because you just the moment where you start having a little bit of stability, you're like, okay, let me pay my parents' bills, let me take care of my sibling, let me help out my cousin that's doing this. And it's one of the things I love so much about our community that we're so loyal, we help each other out, we want to see each other win. But I would say one of the biggest mind shifts that I had to have was realizing if I can be a little bit patient, I am going to be able to help my family even more if I build a good, strong stability first versus any extra dollar that I have, let me give it away. Giving away hasn't gotten us to where we are right now. So we know that we have to change the behavior to see something different.

Violeta 14:54

Yeah. Yeah, I love that because that is definitely something. When I first got a stable paycheck, I had joined the military, which a little bit we have kind of like a similar saying. We say, slow is smooth, smooth is fast. And it's always, you know, that same mindset is like just take your time. It's like if you try to rush it, you're gonna have to then go back and fix stuff, and then it's gonna even slow you down. But if you just take your time, you're actually gonna end up getting accomplishing whatever task or go faster. And whenever I got that staple paycheck, like I felt one, yes, I was wanting to help them, and two, I felt like I needed to pay them back, right? Because I was like, Oh, you know, when I bought them a TV, a stove. Well, they needed the stove, right? And the fridge. But then luckily my dad was like, ooh, like we're we're fine, like take care of yourself first, and then like yami paro and everything. Now he jokes around, he's like, Where's donde está mi tele? Where's my tele? I need another TV. So uh, like, because they still have that TV that I bought them and everything. And so then I did take the time to like focus on myself, and then now, like you mentioned, I am able to do so much even more because I took a little bit of a step back and started focusing on building my foundation and growing, and then now I could I could do so much more for them.

SPEAKER_00 16:13

Yeah, yeah, but I think there's a space between you know taking care of yourself, focusing on yourself to fully retrain financial freedom. And so when that mindset comes in, what does that actually look to you on a day-to-day level? Like the jobs, the sacrifices, what is it that you're trying to achieve, like that you can put on a highlight reel on Instagram? Like, were there any points where like you said, oh, you know, this is where I'm gonna start sacrificing and taking on more jobs and doing different things?

SPEAKER_01 16:46

Oh, yeah, then yeah, this one's a big one. So, right when I graduated college, you know, I started my first big girl job, having a first proper paycheck. And I remember realizing very quickly, oh, I could do this the rest of my life, and I would be fine because it's just me and my dog that we don't need a lot, and I I'm a simple girl. And then I started realizing, but wait, it's not just me, it's not just my dog, like it's my it's my family, and even though I will say this, I'm very grateful to my mom and dad, they never put a burden on me to think that my responsibility was to take care of them, but nonetheless, I saw my parents sacrifice everything for me, so that was embedded internally already. Like I need to give back. And I will never forget when COVID happened. I'm sure you, you know, folks listening to this, you probably remember our economy also tanked for a while. And I remember having this conversation with my mom. And at the time, I started learning what it was to have a 401k and investing in a Roth because these were things that were available to me through my job, and I finally had enough money to start contributing. And I started having this conversation with my mom, and I realized that my mom didn't have enough money like in her 401k to take her through retirement. And I remember I think it was for like three days that I just stared at the ceiling. I couldn't sleep because I was like, like, what what are we going to do? Because we have this understanding of who are my parents going to call for help? I am the only one.

Violeta 18:37

So I really had this Mulan moment where I realized I realized, yeah, I don't know, but it's true because not like I don't think nobody under uh like ex except other like first trans immigrants, like we all have like that realization, the oh shit moment, because I've had that too. And I I think it was around the same time as well, where I really was like, oh shit, like this is going to fall on me. My parents don't have like my parents didn't have a 401k. My dad worked for himself, but you know, like he's getting old now, and it's like, okay, so what is he gonna do? And it yeah, it really takes you out for like a while, and then it's just weighs on you so heavy for a long time, and then that yeah, that you get that anxiety of like, man, I cannot fail. I gotta, I gotta succeed because it's not just me, it's my parents, and they did so much for me that I can't just leave them high and dry.

SPEAKER_01 19:41

Exactly. Yeah, it really left me thinking, okay, I I gotta lock in. It's really, you know, what went through what went through my mind, and I started realizing I have to stop thinking about my job as, oh, this is just something for me. Like, I need to start thinking about at some point my parents may become basically my dependents, and sure, like it would be nice to pay their house off, but at some point I'm going to monthly have to provide for them. And I also realized because I realized this a little bit later in age, that I didn't have a lot of time. I was like, oh, I can't just sit here and coast for 20 years. Before we came to the US, like my mom she started working really young. She worked very physical demanding jobs up until the time she came to the US. And we all see that, I think, a lot, like in our families. Our parents aren't, you know, getting too 75, 80, and they're fine and dandy. A lot of times they age a little bit faster, start having medical issues sooner because of the hard work and labor that they put their body through early on. And that was eye-opening for me as well. Like starting to see my mom like have some health issues and whatnot. I realized, yeah, I I don't have time to just lay back and figure this out. Like, I need to do this right now. And so, yeah, that that was the moment where things changed for sure.

Violeta 21:15

I'd see that right now. My parents are just like 66, and then I think the other one's like 64 or 65. I think she's 65 now. And yeah, I could see like their health deteriorating, and it's kind of like freaking me out, and it's like, because they don't have health insurance. We just rely to go on to Mexico and they get their health care there. So yeah, that's a big burden for us.

SPEAKER_00 21:40

My gotta my parents are in their 70s already, so I'm like sweating bullets every day. But with that, like we do have that cultural model that we have, like taking care of I saw my parents taking care of the grandparents and the kindness that they provided to them when they were going through massive amounts of chronic disease. Strokes, heart attacks, dementia, all of it. Right. And we would like our parents to live together and continue working because I feel like some of my our parents are like so identified with work as well. They feel like if they get out of work, they will lose their identity. So, you know, that's a topic for another podcast. But yeah, my parents are in the 70s, and for me it's like a very present reminder. Also, my dad is deaf. So there's another thing. He was just recently let go from his job, which I think it's I don't know, my dad is a little delusional. So he still thinks he can work construction jobs at 72. Like that's unrealistic. But sometimes he's so convincing of himself that you believe him. Like, oh, he can do it.

Violeta 22:43

But I think that's the other thing, too, is that you know no kidding like understand that they're getting old and they're like, like, I'll try to talk to my dad about the retirement and all that stuff, and he's like, yeah, plenty of times. Like, no, you're not seeing what I'm seeing because you know you've noticed that they're aging and stuff, so yeah, it's definitely something that's freaking me out.

SPEAKER_00 23:04

Yeah, they're afraid of losing their independence, it sounds like. But at the same time, you still have to draw boundaries for your family because you are leaving the nest, you are leaving their household, and you're trying to create a world for you. And some of the traditional values that we have and some of the traditional thoughts and beliefs that we have kind of hold us back, right? So, has there ever been a moment in your life with your family when you had to say no and made it difficult for you and your family all of a sudden?

SPEAKER_01 23:40

Oh, yeah, there has been many times. But one thing that comes to mind is of course, once I started working, my parents they never asked me for anything or to help them with anything. But I I started helping them when I could or when I saw there was a need, and it made sense for me. Like first, I set boundaries with myself where every time I would get paid, of course, I would pay myself first, I'd take care of business, and I'd put aside, okay, this amount has to go into investing, and then I'd keep a small portion, which I would never tell my parents about, but it's basically like I have an emergency fund for them that they don't know about, and it's precisely for when they call it and they say, Hey, like, se me rompió est or I need someone to do this, or I wasn't able to work for a week and so I haven't gotten paid, or you know, whatever it may be. And that's a way for me to be able to help without it being a sacrifice that's going to affect our long-term future because it's not necessarily like sometimes giving more right now is not just taking away from you, but it's taking away from them in the future too. And I think that that's something I had to ingrain a lot in my head. I started saying no a lot once like my first year of working in corporate, all I was thinking about was the basic like 401k, let me learn how to invest a little bit. And I started saving a lot of money, but it was because I knew I have to invest in something. I don't know what that is yet, but it's gonna come. And people talk about luck all the time. Luck doesn't exist, it is when opportunity and preparation meet. But if you have opportunities come your way and you're not ready to take them, you are SOL. And I wanted to make sure, even though I didn't know what I wanted to invest in yet, that when that opportunity came and I figured it out, that I had basically the money to invest. And so around that time, I started having to say a lot of no's to my family because I had moved to California for work, and my family at the time, everyone lived in North Carolina, and they knew I was working as corporate job, and they were asking me, like, hey, come and visit for Christmas, come and come for Thanksgiving. And it wasn't necessarily, you know, the flights, it was a thinking, I'm going to be there for a week and I know who I am. I'm gonna go there and I'm gonna spoil my family, right? And I had to start saying no and realizing instead of doing that, I'm gonna put more money into this. I'm gonna put more money into this. And my family, I honestly, I remember my mom had a heart to heart with me because she thought that maybe I was spending my money on like shopping, or you know, she she thought that I was like in corporate and broke. She was kind of like, Oh, miha, like you started this job, and she's like, you know, I don't want to get like too nosy in your finances, but you seem like you're very tight, like you haven't bought yourself any new clothes. Like, why are you wearing these same old sneakers? Right? I was wearing sneakers until the soul would fall off. Like, I was like, I am locked in, and I think this is a conversation that we need to have more with our families and our parents, even though for them it still may be very taboo or touchy to talk about money. And I think that that like it's okay. Like, our goal doesn't need to be to bring them to educate them financially, but I think like what made a really big difference in my family and I, I had like these hearts to hearts with them. I posted about this recently on LinkedIn, but I sat down with my mom and I was like, hey mom, I want to show you something. Like, I know I know that you know that I've been working in corporate for some time, and I want you to know why I'm saving as much as I'm saving and why I'm investing. And I showed her what my plan for her retirement is, and I was able to tell her, so in order for me to do that, I need to keep on living this way, I need to keep on making these sacrifices, and I want you to know it's going towards something good. And my mom, like, she was in tears, she was just like almost apologetic, like, oh my gosh, I'm so sorry. I've I've been so hard on you. I didn't realize that you had these plans and you're working towards this and you're doing this and you're doing that. I was like, Yes, I am. And so I think sometimes like bringing our parents in a little bit and not a defensive way, because sometimes like they can be more risk averse, but just telling them, like, I want you to know that I'm saving money because I'm doing something for us, for a family, or it's for you, and this is why. So over time it's become easier, and now my family understand, like they understand. It hurts me. I know it hurts them too, like when I can't see them and I can't travel, but it was also very satisfying. I'll never forget, like when I bought my first investment property, I'll never forget the day that I called my mom and I said, Hey, I need you to take a few days off of work. I'm flying you in, we're gonna spend a week together, and you're gonna see like what I've been able to accomplish. And I'll I'll never forget her face. I think that was the moment when it clicked for her too. Like, oh, okay, like this is why she's you know, wearing the same clothes she did three years ago. It's like, yes, mommy, like this is why. So it took some time.

SPEAKER_00 29:24

I'm bound to be a mantanita.

SPEAKER_01 29:27

Yeah, she's like, Yay, you know, yeah, yeah. You know, I always say, like, that that's my like in my head, that's my goal. I always say, yeah, like I'm not worried about taking trips like with someone. Like my favorite thing now to do is is that like I'll call my mom and say, hey, take a few days off, and just be able to treat her and spoil her, and it's not coming at the cost of putting our financial future at risk. Like I've always say, like, less YOLO, mas portafolio, you know.

SPEAKER_00 30:00

And for the listeners too, like I want to mention that it doesn't always have to be like we're sacrificing income and putting money aside. It can also look like sharing what you're learning, right? Open your 401k, open a rotor. If you're still working and still having a job, most of the are family members, because they don't know what the game is of the United States, most people think like the stock market is like gambling. And it could be like gambling if you are playing around and trying to jump on the trends. But the majority of it that we have learned, at least like you know, investing in long-term investments like real estate or even you know, ETFs and index funds, and contributing to your 40k and accepting the match or contributing to your retire, and expecting, especially when they're closer to retirement, expecting to have those gains interest-free, like tax-free. That's that's a ready, you know, a step forward to that financial security that they could have, right? On top of social security, on top of like what they're able to get. So it can look just like, hey, I learned about this concept, and they're gonna be worried because I have family members, they still don't have high yield savings accounts, and that's just like you know, I would say step zero to have. But yeah.

SPEAKER_01 31:25

I wanted to add to that, and this is something that I've learned for a very long time. I was trying to educate my family, and I realized that maybe their interests weren't there or they would consume the information and not do anything with it. So, for example, like with my mom, I started taking a more proactive approach. Like after I stared at the wall for three days, I told my mom, okay, mom, listen, this is what we're gonna do. When you get home from work, we're gonna call Fidelity. I'm gonna stay on the phone with you, and we're gonna sort out your account. And there's been a lot of times like that where I've said, Okay, mom, let's pull out the paperwork from the house. We're gonna read through this mortgage stuff together. And I don't need you to understand it, but I need us to have a plan. I think that's a sacrifice, like your time. It definitely gives flashbacks of you know, being at the doctor's with your parents and you being the translator. But at the end of the day, I'm like, yeah, like the like it's something that I I have to take a deep breath to do because it like it's it's work and there's pushback and and everything, but I always know my future self, I'm going to be grateful that my parents have this set up correctly when they you know when they decide to retire. And all it took was an uncomfortable afternoon of us getting on the phone and talking about money. And I think also to our parents, like they can get defensive, and it's understandable because they feel to your point of what you were saying earlier, of maybe like your dad not wanting to stop work and losing their independence. For them, I with empathy, it has helped me to be patient and understanding like it is hard for my parents to accept the help or to feel like oh, my daughter is the one like helping me get these things in order, but usually that should be my responsibility. The more I've been able to empathize with my parents and think of them as just someone that I'm helping and that I'm there to support them and not, I don't know, like micromanage them in some way, like that's helped a lot.

SPEAKER_00 33:23

Yeah, definitely I was getting flashbacks to like filling out the FAFSA and asking for their tax returns, and they'll be like, You don't need to know how much money I make. I'm like, I'm very aware of how much money you make, and extremely acutely aware of how much money you're bringing in. You tell me all the time.

SPEAKER_01 33:43

That's just traumatic.

Violeta 33:45

Yeah, awesome. Well, thank you so much for coming on here and and sharing your story. And I do want to give you a chance to where people could find you and work with you.

SPEAKER_01 33:59

Yes, absolutely. I am on all platforms as Ingrid Morales underscore. And for those that are interested in learning about financial freedom and investing in real estate, I have my third student cohort on Hustle with Ingrid coming out soon. And there's a wait list for that that you can find in my links and all my bios.

Violeta 34:20

Awesome. Well, thank you so much. All her information will be down in the show notes in the description. And other than that, we will see you in the next episode. Bye.

unknown 34:30

Bye.

Violeta 34:30

Thank you for having me. Bye.